Currently Listening Everything You Want By Vertical Horizon You're A God see related

Update finally!!

Well xanga apparently isn't my thing, ever since the myspace craze i've been sweeped in like the other 18 million lol (i kinda made that number up)

annnnnnywhooooooooo, my life has been wonderful lately. camp is seriously just around the corner and im just freaking about that...i cant wait to get back there and get closer to God. that was seriously the best part of camp both years i went, i just felt so in touch with God. i just am so crazy about camp! omg omg im on team 1 (the green team) kinda funny how every year i've been my favorite color...lol so yaaaaaa. im rooming with Katie k and Britterz!That'll be my second year rooming with her too. she is so halarious at night! im so excited for all this really!

So back to reality, life at home is okish. About month ago my dad has a masive heart attack with his main artiry closed 95%. he survived it but ever since taht its been kinda hard for my family to go back to normal. my dad and i have really never been on good terms but now its gotten a TON better. my mom and i are still close..she'll piss me off alot lately caz of the Chris thing

OH!! Chris and i. wow that is seriously a God thing how that happend. Well John broke up with me sometime in Janurary? i think it was...anyway chris and i got to talking again...and God showed up and brought him back in my life. things havent been better. hes just so amazing...i cant believe this sometimes. i need to pinch myself to see if im dreaming (which im not!)

oh but dont get me wrong we still fight like bitches like we use to. but its different now...were more in love then we were before...i cant believe how wonderful God can be!

i recently got a job. yep ME a job! has katie says im a permadona but hey i dont care i got a job! its on schaumburg road called E. Spencer Salon! yep im the shampoo girl! i get hourly wage plus tips! im so excited! i'll get moooooney!

so thats really all i think i have to say...yes i know i have a boring life and ppl probably wont read this anyway but i dont care! lol yaaa

Currently Listening Barlow Girl By BarlowGirl On My Own see related

(Chorus:) Never Alone by BarlowGirl
I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel you by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone<--------i just love that song...

       Wut the hell is going on with my life? do you ever rememeber those slides when you were little...the really really really really tall ones that seem to go up a million feet high..(even tho it was more like 15 feet lol but hey ur only merly 4 feet high anyway) so ya..you all have gone down those slinds. well i feel like im on that slide with my life your excited at first at the top of the slide..i mean come on....its the top of a slide, anyway, its like ur up there all excited..but it was always crappy at the end of the slide...(i dont know about you but those slides were always murder on my tush i would always fall right on my ass at the end of it) anyway....im at the bottem with a sore butt...so ya..right now my butt is extreamly sore in my life. this dumb excitment that maybe i have a shot at happiness was really unrealistic...i can say it was was my fault...im just so mad at myself for letting my gurad down.

      Ever wanted to pack ur things and start a life somewhere really far away? i would love to do that right now....but hey as ppl say "life sucks" so "get over it" hm...maybe taht would be the BEST bet...too bad getting over depression doesnt come too easily...i sware to god i thought i was done with depression for good..............things change i guess......

finals sucked ass.... i have failed like everyone...so...end of this extreamly depressing entry is...life sucks for me...

Apparently the xanga police are after my butt for not updating. lol chris. well anywhoooo my life latly has major ups then major major downs. i dont really; want to get into that so ya......

i have finals this week. oh gosh.......im really really praying i'll do good caz omgsh...i really need better grades. my mom is always on my ass about it. im really trying too. i mean school is a complete bitch and augh...i just feel like a failur at it...i try and try and nothing...*sigh* w/e

CYT is really not the best either...i really dont want to get into it caz well...i dont want more gossip about me. lets just say, im not in it for much longer. i bet ppl wont notice im gone..eh im getting use to that too.

i got a cell phone finally for christmas...its a Nokia camera phone so its the shizz. so ya im having fun with that amazing phone (whose name is Natasha) i  know im cool...lol . so ya

today was crap. i go to school, did nothing besides review for finals i wanted to shoot myself all day its was so so sooooooooooo boring! oh to top it all off i lost my frickin i-pod! wait no..someone stole it. so i go upstairs to put something in my locker and come down and check my purse and its GONE i was SOOOOOOOO pissed. plus my mom was like WTF! so ya...im kinda screwed....also very pissed. augh!!! im gunna like go to school...and....get up in all their faces and scare them with my eyes...lol

so ya tahts its...i would type more but i keep getting distracted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

ok...i know now im getting a frickin cell phone for x-mas...thats so flippin AWESOME! omgsh!!!!! ahhh! im so excited for that! lol christmas will be really different this year caz i probably wont be able to see my b/f...i might...i PRAY i will...my gosh......but ya were kinda on a break right now....loooong story dont worry yall but ya so its been a big thing for me but w/e im coo really...lol

ahhhhhhhh i made the school play around 15 made it out of like 30ish so ya...lol i guess you can sorta call that an honor..i dont know lol. i just felt like ppl at school dont think im talented....i guess they do so thats a good feeling. but i also tried out for pocahantas which im not really sure im in yet since the list isnt up but ya...john said i did...same with my mom. its just hurtful/degrating to me caz i didnt get a call back but.......not everyone can. only the really really talented ones anyway.... call me immatrue i know i am.....but i was really thinking AGAIN this show would be my big break....10 audtions...no leads...ever. its just kinda sad. a part of me thinks i should just give up...but i cant do that knowing me...w/e

ok...i still need icons \

well then since this totally pisses chris off i'll just do it for him lol. im updating since icon entrys arent cool anymore....their cool in my book lol

anyhooooo chris and i are friends now which makes me so so soooo happy lol. were doing really good at this whole not screaming/hating each other lol. sooo yaaaa im really happy we worked stuff out so now when i see we dont have to walk the other way...so super akward too...lol w/e

life is extreamlly stressful a the moment. i have two audtions tommrow. #1) CYT Pocahantas...hell YES #2) the School play its a bunch of one act plays all comedy...it'll be...interesting...many lines im guess *crosses fingers* that and school is a lil hard...i mean i really really love school but the actual school part is kinda hard...im almost failing a class so im kinda worried...it'll get back up soon im sure of it.

john and i are doing fine. we've been through alot latly but nothing to worry about those who are crazy about us being together....lol j/k. but ya whats really on both of our minds is getting our selves. dont wanna talk much about that so yaaa

ok i cant help it...i need to have some amazing icons

<---so so sooo disturbing....

do you get that?